What's Up Doc?

By Nytol Junkie
March 31 2009

Having spent my formative teenage years growing up in Worcestershire, I've flown the nest to live and work in the North West where, it would appear, rugby union is but a mere flight of fancy for the pub going public whenever the 6 Nations or World Cup graces the nation's screens. My appearance in September in the office sporting my WRFC hoody and clutching my Warrior's mug therefore caused

some rather quizzical looks and pointed questions for here football reigns supreme, the 'real men' play rugby league and the brave few support Sale Sharks.

Now after the particularly devastating defeat to Bristol in the match which SHOULD have seen us safe for another season, one of my colleagues, having noticed my normally cheerful demeanour some what replaced by a furrowed brow and foul mutterings under my breath, asked for the cause of the change..... what a mistake to make.

Now a disease can be described as: "any condition that causes extreme pain, dysfunction, distress and/or death to the person afflicted."
Pain: NEGATIVE - No physical pain felt other than that attributed to the drowning of sorrows or a rare and/or unexpected win the previous day, mainly due to cider.
Dysfunction: NEGATIVE - Mostly in good working order
Distress: POSITIVE - Been witnessed nearing tears on several occasions and wringing hands
Death: NEGATIVE - still alive and kicking thankfully

So is my illogical desire to follow WRFC a previously unrecorded strain of disease I inadvertently caught navigating Worcester high street? Well the symptoms appear to say otherwise.

So how about a physiological addiction? This can be described as: "a recurring compulsion by an individual to engage in some specific activity, despite harmful consequences to the individual's health, mental state or social life."

Health Issues: POSITIVE - Raised blood pressure, headaches, nervous twitches when opposition players have the ball and a lost voice occurring on a regular basis
Mental State Altered: POSITIVE - Been witnessed pulling hair out, ranting uncontrollably, and bouts of weekly melancholy very occasionally punctured by moments of complete delirium
Dubious Social Life: POSITIVE - Chooses to spend most weekends in the season surrounded by fellow suffers.

So is that it then? A compulsion driven by the ever so rare and brief moment of euphoria of a win made all the more sweet by the all the pain and frustration felt the rest of the season...?