On this day, 20 November 2023

By Old Kwin
November 19 2002

No-longer struggling, but still glamorous Harlequins face enigmatic Northampton on Saturday. Quins make six positional changes from the team that played Wycombe last week, all of them on the wing.

MATCH PREVIEW

At a press conference held to launch Quins' new, attractive, but strangely bare Jenny Agutter Press Centre, Backs Coach Paul Turnover explained:  'Again this week we will be mainly selecting wingers - it's something we've worked on hard in training all season and last weekend we were pleased to be able select a back line composed exclusively of these specialist, effective players.

'Firstly, of course, it gives us masses of strength on the wing, but vitally it also gives us extra wingers in the centre as well. Beyond that we also gain a considerable element of surprise by facing up to the opposition with something totally unexpected'   Asked how the surprise factor could possibly last more than 40 minutes, Turnover suggested that if need be, he could always move one of his wingers to scrum half - which would surprise the hookers anyway.

Quins will be captained again by their Blind-Side-Winger Clark Kent, while Saints, who will delay announcing their full line up until just after the programme has gone to print,  will be without their team who are all injured, or busy typing up ancient match reports.

The game kicks off at the uncomfortably early time of 8.30am, in order to make way for the highlight rugby event the weekend: the launch of Saints'  state-of-the-art Big Screen with a rare showing the sci-fi classic Logan's Run.

 

DISCIPLINARY ROUND UP

Quins faced a further disciplinary blow this week when it was announced that Inside-Wing   Bilbo 'Well Hard' Gellings has been summoned for a disciplinary hearing by the busy International Mascot Board .

Unfortunately for the hapless Gellings the offence with which he has been accused (which is not yet known) is taken extremely seriously by the IMB.  Inside sources have hinted of allegations of swearing  and so, in a worst case scenario, it's possible that Bilbo could face a Shunning.   The club, however, will be hopeful that he can escape with a Stern Reprimand by showing that he didn't start it anyway.

As is normal in these cases the verdict has already been reached (guilty); next month's hearing will commence with sentencing, after which the prosecution will sum up, the evidence will be glossed over and finally the charges revealed. There will be no case for the defence.